Instilling Confidence In Nervous Flyers

You won’t be flying long before you encounter passengers who are nervous about flying. When it first happened to me, it caught me unprepared. I should have been ready with some good answers because the nervous flyer was my mom.

In our family lore was the story of the plane crash that Mom survived when she was only 25 years old. She was a passenger on a Sikorsky S42B Clipper that caught fire on takeoff at Manaus, Brazil, and sank in the middle of the Amazon River. She barely escaped with her life. As I grew up, she kept a stiff upper lip and travelled with us without ever complaining. I never realized she was afraid until the day I went to see her off on a Golden West Airlines Twin Otter flight from Ontario, California. “I don’t want to get on that little plane, Rog,” she said, and I could see she meant it.

Fear of flying is real and should not be dismissed as unimportant by those who are more comfortable in flight. A 2016 AARP study of travelers found that 23% of older passengers described themselves as fearful of flight, and the percentage ranged as high as 38% for people in their twenties and thirties. Some of the reasons often given for this dread are fear of heights, of injury, of confinement and of loss of control. 

To get a better explanation of this fear I called my old friend and colleague Ron Nielson, a retired airline captain who runs “Fearless Flight,” a coaching and counseling service for nervous flyers. He confirmed that between 18% and 25% of travelers are afraid or reluctant to fly. Some are “white-knuckle flyers,” who fly for business but hate the experience. Others are “avoiders,” who simply don’t fly, and some are just nervous about being on a plane. He said 65% of his clients are between the ages of 19 and 49. 

Ron has been in business for over 31 years. He conducts classes, provides one-on-one counseling sessions, and conducts “graduation” flights for his clients. On his website, fearlessflight.com, he describes three core elements he has developed that explain the fear and help people learn how to fly with confidence. First, there’s the psychology of fear of flying. The limbic system—the natural fight, flight or freeze response of the body—hijacks your emotions. Second, people don’t understand the principles of flight. Third, there are tools to help you successfully cope with your fears.

Sometimes people’s anxiety is triggered by news of a recent accident. In an interview with the Arizona Republic, Ron said: “We get that little voice that says, ‘You know I wasn’t too big on flying and now I'm hearing all these things that can go wrong and I just don’t think it is safe.’ And that has nothing to do with safety. All it has to do with is your confidence and the ability to find some peace on the airplane.” 

Reassure But Don't Lecture Passengers
Understanding that Ron’s business is primarily focused on helping passengers, I asked him what advice he would give pilots. “Saying ‘don’t worry’ is no help,” he said. “You have to ask: “what are you worried about today?” Being available to passengers who board early and have questions is the number one way to help. Your exact words are less important than the fact that you are available. Nervous passengers need to be able to connect with the pilot. They need to be able to say, “Hi, I’m a little nervous about the flight today. Is there anything you can tell me about the flight?” This is your cue.

What the passenger is seeking is reassurance, not a lecture. If they are concerned about turbulence, be ready to explain what turbulence is, the airplane’s ability to ride out bumps, and what kind of ride conditions to expect that day. One way to explain turbulence is to describe the airplane as a cork floating along in a stream, bobbing up and down with the water flow but undamaged by it. 

The groaning and whining of motors and valves unnerves some people. The flap drive motor on a Boeing 737 and the power transfer unit (PTU) on an Airbus A320 are common noises that can trigger people’s anxiety. Whatever the noise is on your airplane, be ready to give a short explanation, including the fact that the noise is normal and is in no way indicative of an emergency.

Another phenomenon some people notice is the flexing of the wings. A short explanation of how the wings create lift can help as long as you aren’t pedantic about it. That leads to another subject: PA announcements.

When you are in flight and turn on the seat belt sign, the way you describe possible turbulence matters. Some people think, “omigod, this is the end!” Ron says you should avoid being too complex or too simplistic in your explanation about turbulence. A technical lecture goes over their heads and an elementary explanation is offensive. You should point out that the seat belt sign is nothing to be alarmed about. You want the flight attendants to be safe by being seated and belted just like the passengers are. You are reassuring the passengers that this is a normal precaution, not an emergency.

Both my Dad and I were pilots, and I made the classic mistake of assuming that if flying was fun for us, it would also be fun for Mom. I was caught flat-footed when Mom told me she was afraid that day in Ontario. I told her the airline was safe, the airplane was safe, and the flight over to LAX would be short. She would soon be on a larger plane on her way home. 

I don’t think I was very convincing. I hadn’t yet figured out that fear of flight is real and should be taken seriously. When she got aboard that plane and waved goodbye, I think it was one of the bravest things she ever did.